Buses - Poetry In Motion

Last night I was sitting at a table in the Hyena Comedy Cafe, Newcastle, listening to my wife read her poem to a large audience. She had a poem published in the Iron Book Of New Humorous Verse (IRON Press 2010 - available at all good book shops) and this was the launch party for the book. Her poem was called 'Jobs bloodbath at Goldman Sachs' and ended with the verse:

"I'll not have the boys go to school in a ghetto,
I'll never, not ever start shopping at Netto"
She looked down at John for one last time
And there on his forehead she read 'sub-prime'.

I am so proud of her. It is a great achievement, writing verse which really is very funny. Often, like many others I've tried, failed miserably and given up after the first line:

I wandered lonely as a bus driver
That floats on high o'er oil spills and the general public...

The curfew tolls the knell of parting day
The billowing bus winds slowly over the lea......

Leyland Leopard! Leyland Leopard! burning bright
In the bus lanes of the night.......

Total disaster.

But where I have failed others have succeeded. Poetry seems to be the fashion on the buses. Here are a few links to bus companies and public corporations which have encouraged the placing of poems on buses:

http://www.islandfm.com/gallery/category.php?urlpiccategory=Poems+On+The+Buses&catref=
(Guernsey)

http://metro.kingcounty.gov/prog/poetry/poetry.html
(Seattle)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/humberside/hi/people_and_places/arts_and_culture/newsid_9070000/9070123.stm
(East Yorkshire)

http://www.parkerandcollinson.co.uk/page20.html
(Nottingham)

http://ah.brookes.ac.uk/poetry/onthebus/comments
(Oxford)

.........and so it goes on. People have time to burn on buses, so why not read poetry. It alleviates the boredom of the journey to work on the No. 681. Maybe I should have another go and rebrand myself as the Poet Laureate of the buses.

On second thoughts it would be more prudent to leave it up to someone who is good at writing poetry - my wife. Besides there is not enough time to concentrate. I am being distracted at the moment by the teachers behind me who are discussing the latest beauty therapy.

"I went to Appyfeet last week," said one lady.

"Was it a good film?" asked the other.

"No it wasn't a film - it was these nibbling fish. They nibbled off all my dead skin and corns around me big toe."

"How disgusting."

"No it was rather pleasant actually. A tickling sensation."

"Rather you than me."

I silently agreed and went back to composing some truly terrible poetry in my head.